Sunday, April 18, 2010

Spiritual Encouragement





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If you need immediate assistance, dial 911. 
The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).






When a woman is in an abusive situation she can feel that either her faith has let her down or that she has let her God down.

Either of those are very uncomfortable places in which to find yourself.

I stayed in harmful situations and went back to unhealthy situations sometimes because of my faith.

Then one day in prayer I was put in remembrance of a little known scripture which was..."make no friendship with an angry man and with a furious man thou shalt not go lest you learn his ways and get a snare unto your soul"...which is in proverbs of the King James version of the Bible...

While it true that God hates divorce...newsflash...he is not keen on all sin...

If women are staying in abusive situation because of their faith...then maybe the people in the faith community are contributing to their suffering...

A woman being abused needs to get away to a safe place...needs spiritual and emotional counseling...she may need to break many chains of bondage in her own life as well...She needs to be safe...and learn and practice healthy habits...then only as a whole functioning person can she decide if she wants to also tend to her marriage...but there is little chance for a restored relationship there if the man hasn't been working just as hard spiritually and emotionally to become healthy as well...

Both people need healthy and strong coping skills...the dynamic in the abusive relationship needs to be broken...and rebuilt...if that is not possible...safety is more important than proving one's faith...

Speaking to proving one's faith...we as humans cannot prove our faith to an all knowing God...he already knows what measure of faith we have...if we also have a gift of faith as well...and at which level we are going to be found true to that faith...

If Jesus were standing right there with you as your husband, mate or partner were hitting you...what would he say? He would not be okay and sit by an watched you be abused...

It is okay to get away from being abused...and still be found to be a faithful Christian woman...

When I finally was able to break free from my children's father he stopped hurting me emotionally...but here was the interesting part...a short time later he also stopped going to church...perhaps in his case he was not really a Christian...the evidence points to the fact that he seemed to be using his faith and knowledge of the things of God as ammunition to use in his power struggle to control and abuse me...

So all the times that I thought I was being a dutiful wife and faithful wife by staying...I was just being around an abusive situation longer for no reason at all..

Get away...get to safety...and pray...God will give you peace about how to proceed...and like I said...if Jesus was standing there not only would you husband, mate, partner not hit or abuse you...he would protect, shield and cover you from being hit...

Some women die in their abusive situations almost afraid of letting God down...do not be one of those women...get out...get to safety...rebuild your self...

Proverbs 22 says...make no friendship with an angry man...and with a furious man thou shalt not go lest you learn his ways and get a snare unto thy soul.

Love,
Michelle



2 comments:

  1. I think it's pertinent to mention that men also will suddenly "find religion" when their wife or girlfriend leaves them. This can be used as a manipulation tool. My ex did this, and I though I hoped with all my heart it was the truth, I could not believe it, because I could believe nothing he said anymore. The proof is in the pudding, as they say. A God-fearing man would not abuse his wife. The Bible says, "Husbands, love your wives as Christ loves the church." Husbands are meant to be protectors of their families, not tormentors.

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  2. I know that it is hard to post on a blog like this because you could be a a real crisis and not what your information shared or able to be traced. And I am speaking to the metaphoric "you" not any particular person.
    I watched a movie that other night that was very good regarding abuse; it was called "Waitress". And the chilling part was that the husband, earl could have been a dead ringer for my ex...he had the same mannerisms, insecurities and manipulations...it was eerie to watch...until I remembered that there in fact certain and universal traits that abusers share.It why so many of our stories can sound "close".

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